What not to do in Writing

But I broke all the rules… And it turned out as you would expect.

Someone tweeted Elmore Leonard’s 10 Rules for Writing on Twitter:

How many of Elmore's "rules" do you break? pic.twitter.com/fQrmnC8fCd

— Mαɾƚყɳ R. Wιɳƚҽɾʂ (@UKHamlet) October 17, 2022

A while back on Facebook, someone else has also posted these rules, and I decided to (tongue in cheek) write a short story that broke them all.

Prologue: Sandy started dating Chad, the jock.

It was a dark and stormy night in the best of times and worse of times. Sandy, a tall, lanky figure with really dark hair and everyone complained she was too pale and thin, walked into her flat,ranch-style brick house that she hated so much. The grey clouds match the fake plaster brick house.

When she stepped inside the aging, glass front entrance, her brother, a short chubby, round, character who was adopted from another country, greeted, “Allo, sissy -we air all outta of biscuits, eh?”

She was about to respond when suddenly, all hell broke loose and their ceiling caved in.

“Like, omg!” Sandy exclaimed loudly. “It’s like that creepy stalker that keeps following around! Jim! I can’t believe it!”

“I only admired you from afar, m’lady,” Jim moaned loudly as he slowly stood up and glared at her brother.

“Oh, I change my mind, then,” Sandy said. “I’m so in love with you, I’ll dump chad and let’s elope where it’s legal where a minor can marry someone twice her age!”

Epilogue: In two years, Sandy and Jim divorced.

I originally posted here: Elmore Leonard’s 10 Rules for Good Writing – Part 1